10 things i learned in 2019.

it's almost two weeks into the new year, and although i'm not one for a list of resolutions, there have been things that i learned, and that i benefitted from in 2019, that i want to take into 2020. these things, they've impacted my everyday, my character, my health and growth.

meditation

i've talked about this in previous posts, it's benefits and also how to start. adding this into my daily routine each night has not only helped me sleep better, but i find that i possess more patience, and spend less energy on the things i cannot change in life.

mediation is about accepting and then letting go, not ignoring as we sometimes confuse with our practice. this has translated into other areas of my life. i used to overthink everything, even just a small interaction with a total stranger i would never see again. but with a little help from this incredible practice, i've taken 'letting go' into other areas of my day where i accept and acknowledge, and then release any stress so i am not forced to carry it with me.

pilates

i work for a megaformer / lagree studio, and although one would think i would take class more as an instructor, it's actually not the case. this past year i made it a priority to get in my class time as a client not just as an instructor. a boutique fitness class that is both motivating and safe, and teaches us to move slower has again helped my mental clarity and has made me stronger both physically and mentally.

our lives have been influenced by social media and the idea that being busy all the time is the best way to achieve our goals and live a fulfilled life. so we overload our schedules, work harder, and constantly worry about the future. not that this is bad, but it's important to slow down; one, because you'll wear yourself out as i have before and two, we make less mistakes and produce better productivity when we take our time to do things correctly. even just re-reading an email before sending it to check for grammar or to ensure everything you need to communicate is presented and concise. slowing down in class has helped me to slow down out of class. plus, those fifty minutes are my 'me time,' without my phone or any interruptions to gain some clarity in an otherwise busy day.

taking social media breaks

many of us have careers that include social media which makes taking a break challenging. but living in the moment is important, spending time with loved ones without your phone out, scrolling through someone else's highlight reel so that you can enjoy your life and the moments that make up your time here. plus a little mystery is a good thing, keeping some things private is enticing.

5 minute journal

i'm a firm believer in having a creative activity, whether it's your job or just keeping a bullet journal, inspiration boards on pinterest, whatever works for you. but this journal has truly changed my days, my outlook and caused me to dig deep. it's easy to be thankful for food, the roof over your head, opportunities others don't have. but what this 5 minute journal does is really force you to appreciate every single moment of your life and who is in it. and for me, it's helped me make the necessary and sometimes scary changes i know i need to in order to benefit my self care and self growth.

planner / time blocking

it can be challenging to fit our 'to-do' list all into one day. how does one get it all done? i've learned to use my physical planner (sorry iCal) and a time blocking method. a planner is self explanatory for the most part, it aids one in keeping organized. i use my planner primarily so i don't forget anything, don't double book or overload my day when there's an event. but time blocking, this has truly saved me. i found myself struggling to find the time and mental space for big picture thinking, and was spending too much time in 'reactive mode' responding to texts, emails etc. i learned about task batching and how to acknowledge work that is urgent but not important for my goals... i'll write more about this in an upcoming blog but the books i can highly recommend are 'Unfu*ck yourself by Gary John Bishop, The Productivity Project by Chris Bailey + The One Thing by Gary Keller.

regular home clean outs

many times our home looks clean and organized but behind that closet door, under the couch or the bed, in the nooks and crannies hidden there is a mess of 'stuff.' feeling calm in my own humble abode is important for for mental clarity, which means not feeling like there's a bunch of 'crap' i don't need lying around. during the week, tossing things into a junk drawer, sweeping it under the couch 'for now' throwing your scarf and gloves on the floor of the closet, it's not that uncommon when you're busy and too tired to put away the things in your home. but when things are in place and i know what i have, everything takes less time to do: getting dressed in the morning, finding my keys or a tool i need to fix the clip on attached to my spin shoes... of course there are days where it's too much effort or there's no time to 'tidy up' properly. so about once a month i go through the junk drawer, the closet, the storage space under the sink and organize, throw away, and clean. this has cleared up time in my everyday and again, aided immensely in my attempts to create a less stressful life.

volunteering

of course they say volunteering should be a selfless act but the truth is, helping each other, it makes us feel good. and what's wrong with that? you should feel good, it's nice to be needed, wanted, and appreciated. plus you will always meet people who you'll find inspiring and many times, make new friends to continue doing volunteer projects with in the future.

compliments

i am very uncomfortable being complimented. and honestly i'm sure there is some psychological reason for why, but i'm the worst offender of downplaying myself. so i am still working on this, but when i consciously think,' wow, thank you' and reciprocate this to the other person, i always feel better about myself and the interaction. compliments are a small, easy way to be kind, to change someone's mood or mindset or day around to be more positive and uplifting. why shouldn't we take the compliments people give? it's their contribution to acknowledge your success or hard work, or talent. it's not rude or egotistical to take a compliment, in fact it may be rude to disregard or negate the compliment all together... so in this new decade i'm making the conscious effort to compliment others and to take compliments with a smile and a 'thank you' because after all, it's nice to be noticed and acknowledged.

patience

definitely still working on this. in situations where i can feel my patience diminishing, a little pep talk always helps, and in some cases self responsibility. if i left the house late for work, it isn't the person in front of me going to the speed limits fault i'm going to be late, it's mine... or with children, listening to my mom tell a story that should take five minutes but is taking twenty, with conversations - actually listening and not just thinking about the next thing i want to say. some of us just aren't blessed with this gift of patience, but when i relax and again, let go, i find that i can appreciate the moment or acknowledge my own place within a situation.

saying 'yes'

i always think of the movie 'yes man' when i talk about this topic with others. as an introvert and a home-body i tend to decline offers to go out on the weekends, to meet up for coffee dates or shopping dates. i like being on my own time, having control over my everyday, even eating at home because i can control the ingredients in my food. but having robb as my boyfriend, well this has definitely gotten me out of my comfort zone, and forced me out of the house more often. not only do i feel good, even energized, spending more time around others, i actually enjoy the time out; i learn about whats going on in my friends' lives, laugh, and always feel a little more loved when i leave.